Little blue pills

I trust these little blue pills
Will be good for me eventually
But my body protests
I am vaguely nauseous
I wake early one morning
In waves of sickness
I crawl to the bathroom
Crouch on the cool tiles
Keep my head between my knees
Silently chanting
“Don’t be sick, don’t be sick”
Until it passes
Leaving every muscle trembling
But do I blame the pills
Or that double chocolate donut
Bought on a whim
At a franchise of questionable
I think I am shakier than normal
And hungrier too
But I also have caffeine withdrawal
So how to tell
What is real
What is in my head
Moot point I guess
Because it’s all in my head
Chemicals dissolving in my bloodstream
Traveling to my brain
Affecting the way my neurons fire
Remapping – rewiring
I’ve no idea what’s being done
But I’m less scared than usual
Does that mean it’s working